DEALING WITH ABUSED WOMEN TO DO NOT TO DO Make sure you have enough time to listen in a safe space. Explain that there is professional secrecy and that you will not reveal anything to her partner/husband. Reassure her that you will believe everything she tells you. Ask open-ended questions (e.g. How long has the violence been going on? , Has it worsened over time? , Are there any weapons in the house? , Have you and any children been threatened? ). If there are children, help her understand that she is not a bad mother if she decides to report it and that she will not be parted from her children because of this or because of the separation. Give her the number of the nearest anti-violence centre. Do not judge the conflicting feelings reported by the woman towards her partner/husband (love-hate; idealisationdevaluation). Do not give judgments or advice regarding what she should do. Do not take personal initiatives. Do not ask: Why don t you leave him? , Why didn t you leave before? . Do not force the woman to talk. Role-play PROBLEM A woman has been subjected to violence on the part of a man Create a safe and welcoming environment Use active listening Provide information on: immediate medical assistance, possibility of having psychological support, possibility of reporting to the authorities, anti-violence centres to contact Share your personal experience if necessary to show empathy to the other AIMS Location: emergency room of a hospital Characters: emergency room male doctor and female patient of about 35 years old with a visible bruise under her eye Case-study: the woman speaks with difficulty and in a low voice and says that she got the bruise from hitting her face on the edge of a piece of furniture. The doctor listens to her, treats her, and recommends psychological support to overcome the trauma. The woman is hesitant and surprised when the doctor mentions the possibility of reporting violence and provides her with the contacts for local anti-violence centres. EXERCISE 1 Location: emergency room of a hospital Characters: female emergency room doctor and female patient of about 45 years old Case-study: the woman immediately says that her husband hit her. At the doctor's request, she recounts what happened and that she feels inadequate as a mother and wife because even a friend tells her that slaps are not serious and that they can happen. The doctor reassures her, confirms that she is bound by professional secrecy, and checks that the woman and her children can be safe at home. When the woman worries about the possibility that they could take her children away if she reports the violence, she reassures her by telling her that the law protects her and providing her with numbers of anti-violence centres in the area. EXERCISE 2 8.1 HANDS ON 355